Or at least finished.
Yes, it's true! 150 pages totaling 109,455 words, including "The End." The rough draft of the largest and most ambitious piece of writing I've ever written in my life is now complete, which also means I've reached the biggest realistic/measurable goal I've ever set for myself. I suppose part of me expected instantaneous parades and fanfare, but... within the silence, there is congratulation and praise.
I guess.
In a way, I'm also sad. I've been on a long and difficult journey with these characters, and now the journey is over. But it's not really over. This is only the rough draft--it's only the beginning. Now is the time when I let my inner critic come out (for limited periods of time, at least) to work with my creative self and carve this large and unsightly piece of marble into something much more beautiful and pleasing. There will be additions, subtractions, and changes of all kinds.
To be honest, I've only scratched the surface of this novel. Writing the rough draft is the easy part where you can do anything you want. Now I have to work slower and be more calculated and careful, using good judgment and sense to know what I should change to make the story better, rather than worse, than it is right now. For a while, that will probably be fairly easy. But there will come a point, probably many times, where I simply don't know whether to choose Decision X or Decision Y, and it will be frustrating and cruel. I'm hoping that when those times come, I'll have some supporters out there (read: anyone I can convince through any means necessary) who will help me pick the best choice and create a product that people will enjoy.
But for now? I'm taking a little vacation. I'll keep it in the back of my head and I'll write down any ideas I get here and there, but I won't look at my rough draft for a little while (maybe even a whole month) so that when I come back to it, I'll have the fresh perspective a reader might have (ideally).
I'm a bit intimidated, actually. 100,000 words (almost 110,000) is a lot of words. But I'll take it one step at a time, one day at a time, until... well, until the story tells me it's ready. I have faith that it will let me know when that day comes.
I'm excited, you guys.
EDIT--
Huh. This quote showed up in my Google Reader today.
"We begin to see that the completion of an important project has every right to be dignified by a natural grieving process. Something that required the best of you has ended. You will miss it." - Anne Wilson Schaef
2 comments:
Congratulations! That is quite an accomplishment.
I think the hardest thing I've ever faced with finishing a large rough draft of a book I've really loved is thinking about all of the things that you wanted to do that never fit in. I know that happened to me. My favorite part of writing is the brainstorming where ideas really take shape, so it's hard for me to give that up completely to focus on the writing aspect.
Still, enough about my writing. Congratulations on finishing. That's huge, particularly considering the fact that you started it just in November. When are you going to make it available to read? Once you feel you've revised it enough, are you going to publish it on Lulu?
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